You Sank My Battleship!
by CarolinaWhiteRose
Summary: When The Outlaw star crew and the cowboy Bebop crew crash into each other, can they prove to the judge it was the other's fault?
1. Chapter 1

**Hey you guys! This is my second attempt at a crossover and I believe it to be my best one of the two. Tell me guys what you think so far, and I'll be sure to use your comments and suggestions in the writing of my fanfic. Well, without further Ado, I present my second crossover. (Cowboy bebop, and Outlaw Star neither of which I own) Enjoy**

_**You Sank My BattleShip!**_

A tiny speck of dust floated its way across the endless sky, making its way slowly towards the nostril of a fuzzyheaded lunk. Unaware of the dust, he opened his mouth and threw another pop of popcorn in and chewed happily. He was laying on an old broke down couch, watching an old broken down TV and his only joy for the day was waiting for his favorite TV show to come on. The dust twirled on the breeze of his exhaled breath, and waited patiently for the moment when it would enter his lungs and cause all hell to break lose.

He closed his eyes for just a second, and opened them sharply just as a large girl landed painfully on his stomach, and more than likely rearranged his vital organs. He peered at her angrily for a second but she paid him no mind as she continued running away from what he guessed to be some invisible friend of something. He closed his eyes again, and willed the sleep to come when no more than a few seconds later, he was the trampoline of a mutt. The dog didn't bother to stop on Spike, and it continued on its way chasing after Ed, the crazy jumping girl. Well, they were the only two fools on the bebop crazy enough to bother him during his sleep, so why not try again right? Well, he did try again...but he was absolutely wrong, there were other fools on the ship cruel enough to invade his sleep time. After about 10 minutes of blissful sleep, a vivacious female stepped lightly in the room looking for her prey. She wore heeled ankle white boots, and yellow short shorts suspended to a tiny yellow midriff top. Her pretty purple hair hung low into her face, causing the look o something much more dramatic than she proved to be when sleeping. Her stomach was nicely carved and although she looked fit, she wasn't light at all. She made her way over to her dear friend Spike, and settled herself on his stomach.

**Damn Faye… what the hell do you want!**

_**I gotta go pick up some groceries for Jet, do you mind coming with me?**_

**Are you kidding me?**

_**Come on Spike, I don't like going there alone. A tiny feminine little thing like me always needs some sort of protection. Besides, the butcher is always giving me dirty looks.**_

**Feminine and you don't even belong in the same sentence first off, second, the only reason the butcher keeps looking at you is because you look like a damned whore.**

_**Really Spike! Do ya really and truly mean it?**_

**Sure Faye, anything for you.**

_**Do ya promise? **_

**Mhmmm, I promise. **

_**But seriously Spike! Please! I'll buy you cigarettes AND a drink.**_

**As tempting as that may sound, I can't really make up my mind when my stomach is being merged with my kidneys.**

Faye reluctantly stood up and allowed Spike his breathing room. It seemed when he was finally able to breathe, that little dust fucker attacked and clogged his lungs for a few seconds. He sat up quickly, coughing out the little furball, as Faye whacked his back just about as hard as she could. When he finally managed to breathe easily again, his eyes were full of tears and his back was badly bruised. Well, that's the last time he sleeps in the living room he reasoned. He threw his legs over the side of the couch, stood, and reached for his pack of ciggies. He lit one, and inhaled slowly, enjoying the taste of sweet nicotine once again making his body a slave to it. Faye reached her fingers to his lips, and he allowed her to remove the cigarette from his mouth. Her slender apricot fingers held tightly to the cigarette as she took a long drag and quickly passed it back to Spike. She exhaled the sweet smoke, and after a few moments refocused on the task at hand.

**_Spike, please, I would really appreciate it if you came to the store with me. _**Hmm, maybe if she tried being nice it would work.

**Faye cut the nice shyt it doesn't become you. And maybe if you shut your mouth for more than 5 minutes I could tell you that yeah I'll go with you.**

_**And I thought you liked me when my mouth was open.**_

**I did, until I found out that you actually spoke words too.**

_**Alright whatever, just lets go… We are taking your ship. **_

**Alight, Alright, shut up already. **

Suddenly, Faye was forced into Spikes arms as the ship crashed into something in mid space. Suddenly lights they didn't even know existed were going off. Faye was too busy looking around to really realize she was still clutching to Spike, but when she finally did realize it, her face turned into a deep blush. Spike merely smirked, and said that she had good taste. She pulled back, and he let her pull away from him. Suddenly, Jet dodged into the room red in the face and frantic.

**We've been hit and there was 10 damage done to the Bebop!**

Spike dropped to the couch and lifted his legs up on top of the glass coffee table. With a smirk he took the cigarette out his mouth, and exhaling slowly laughed out loud.

**Well, Faye, looks like I can't go to the store with you.**

GENE! GENE! It appears that we've hit another ship.

**No shyt Gilliam. Give me a status report, How much damage was done?**

At least 25 Gene.

**Are you kidding me! **

I Really wish I were Gene.

The tall redhead heartthrob made his way over to the middle seat in the control center of the ship. He was quite the sight, which his three scars across his face, a strong broad chin, and a body that would put Arnold to shame. He pressed a silver button on the gray dashboard, and 5 clear screens popped up before him. He touched the first one, and images of the ship he was on, popped up. The damages done to the ship flashed in red as he looked over the poor Outlaw Star. Just as he was about to switch the second screen a young blonde boy came running into the command room, screaming about terribly dents done to the ship, and how it would take thousands of woo longs to fix it. He was dressed in baggy clothes that easily became him. Although not as old as Gene, he sounded to be just as wise, if not wiser. Gene raised his hand as if to shush the boy, but that only seemed to bring in more people. Suzuka Twilight, the beautiful assassin showed up at the door, but she was quickly pushed out of the way by the damned Ctrl-Ctrl, Aisha. Suzuka was dressed in her traditional white kimono, and she had he long black hair tied up and back with Chinese sticks. She was the epitome of beauty and Grace. Aisha on the other hand was nothing but brawn and strength. She looked to be a breed between a human and white cat, and a long white braid connected to her furry white ears. Her body was just as fit if not more than Gene's and she looked to have super human strength. Her mouth was the most obvious feature about her as she opened it wide to join Jim and Suzuka with yelling at Gene over the ship's condition. Gene opened his mouth to scream at the three annoying him when Gilliam, the tiny pink robot, appeared once again in front of him once again.

Gene?

**What is it now Gilliam!**

Gene, Suzuka, Aisha, Jim and yourself have been accounted for, but I can't seem to find Melfina anywhere.

**Isn't she in her tank!**

No Gene, she hasn't been inside for quite a few hours now.

**No wonder we crashed into another ship!**

Now Gene! I resent that comment! I'm quite capable of navigating the Outlaw Star without the assistance of Melfina.

**Well obviously NOT Gilliam if we are a floating wreck!**

Gene I-

**Listen, save it till I come back! I have to go find Melfina!**

With that, Gene, jumped up from his station and made his way out of the room. The three were left to help Gilliam get the ship under control, and they took their separate stations throughout the control room.

One level Below, Gene is seen running and opening each door. Debris and sparks were everywhere. Barrels were all over the floor, and a few had opened and deposited everything from vegetable oil, to salt all over the floor. His voice was the only sound besides sirens going off that called. He kept yelling her name, in hopes of finding her, and beginning to clear up this mess.

**Well, what do you guys think? I'm actually quite proud of it. Tell me what you think, its really you that matters the most here. So be sure to review! Talk to you guys later! **


	2. Aisha Destroys The Day

**Hey you guys! Here is the next chapter of this oh so loveable fanfic. I hope you like it, and I'm too tired to say much else so please make sure to review on your way out. Have a very nice day! ----**

_**You Sank My BattleShip!**_

It seems that the Bebop crew are experiencing some technical difficulties. Let's take a look shall we?

In the lounging room, a tiny fly flew to and fro, buzzing across the room. It sailed across a sea of yellow, and buzzed past a foamy green only to meet its demise between the breasts of a painted woman. Spike lifted the book off the coffee table, examining the damage done to the cover. Well, the bug mostly stuck to the coffee table, which is good. Besides it wasn't his book to care. He then shrugged his shoulders and turned the page. He was laying off to the left side of the big comfy couch, seated happily in the groove he had took quite a few lazy days to make. His slightly hairy legs were tangled with another's smooth peachy ones as he leaned back and enjoyed the dirtiest part of the novel. On the other side of the yellow broke down couch, was Faye, deep into her own novel, which had an Indian man and a half-naked woman on the cover. Her mouth was half-open and the book just a few inches from her face as she speedily read in shock about what she was going on in the book. Did Jake really dump Little Bear for Morning Glory! And was she having his baby! You've got to be shitting her! Faye's legs were weaved with Spike, and if one were to stand both would go tumbling. So neither moved, not that they wanted to. They continued to read and read, enjoying both the dirtiness, and how perverted their books were. Of course…from Faye's library. Both ignored the sudden red lights that were flashing and the computer's constant scream of Fire.

Suddenly Ed, a loveable little brat with long limbs and flaming red hair shot into the room. Ein was right behind her, and both managed to cartwheel over the couch completely missing both companions, much to the happiness of both Faye and Spike. Right behind them, came a running Jet who had a fire extinguisher in his hand and a worried look upon his face. Turning to his right, he spotted a small fire burning in the room, and hurriedly extinguished it.

_You two mean to tell me you did not see that fire in here!_

_Well, we did, but I decided you should take care of it. _

_**Jet! I did ask him, but he said you would handle it, so why should I worry my pretty little head?**_

_You two have got to be kidding me! The ship has 10 percent damage, fires are breaking out all over the and any minute now, we'll lose power and yet, you two are sitting on the couch reading?_

_**You're right Jet! I'll go get in a shower, before the heater goes out again. **_

_I can't believe you guys!_

_Me neither. I was just about to go in there! _

_ARG! You two are-_

_**Boom!**_

-------------------------

_Heh, I guess I shouldn't have touched that._

_Awww Man! Aisha! Tell me you didn't just fire at the other ship!_

_I'm sorry, I was just trying to help stabilize the ship!_

**Yeah, By destroying the other. I see why your planet was destroyed.**

_Now you look here Suzie!_

**Don't call me that Aisha!**

_Hey, hey. hey! No fighting now you guys! Suzuka do you think you can help me to stabilize the ship? I'd rather Aisha just stood there._

_I told you! I was just trying to help!_

**No Jim, I'm afraid I don't know any of the controls, and the only thing I would do would be to cause more damage to the ship. **

_All right, thanks any way Suzuka. Just strap yourself in. Gilliam?_

**Yes Jim?**

_Can you locate Gene?_

**He is in the lower storage area looking for Melfina.**

_He hasn't found her yet!_

**I'm afraid not Jim. **

_All right, well, show me the locations where the damage is done on the Outlaw Star and give me a reading of the ship we crashed into._

Suddenly, at Jim's station to the far left of the control Center, 5 screens popped up showing damage to the hull, the cockpit, and a few other minor rooms.

**As far as the other ship goes. It is called the Cowboy Bebop, and is the home to 5 beings. Faye Valentine, Spike Spiegel, Jet Black, Edward, and Ein. Valentine, Spiegel and Black are said to be bounty hunters much like Gene and yourself. Ed however is hacker, and a skilled one at that, while Ein is a dog said to be carrying a valuable chip in its stomach. **

_Can I get a picture of all 5?_

Just as soon as the words left Jim's mouth, he saw the face of Faye, sticking out her tongue of course. Net to her was Spike, licking his lips, and Jet rubbing the bald top of his head. The only picture of Ed available was of her feet, and Ein had managed to get her entire tail into the picture… minus the rest of her. Suzuka and Aisha had started peering over his shoulder and all three were peering curiously at the pictures when the door opened and in came Gene with an injured Melfina.

_Gene! You're back!_

_**Yeah, no thanks to the rest of you!**_

_OHH shut your mouth Starwind! I was busy in here helping Jim!_

**Yes, destroying the other ship more. She managed to send a missile right into the hull of the other ship, all without breaking a sweat.**

Gene had let Melfina down to the ground and turned angrily at Aisha.

_**Please tell me you did not, fire at the other ship.**_

_I'm sorry Gene! It was a mistake._

_**Arg, now they have legal rights to sue!**_

_What do you mean?_

_**Had the ships just crashed, insurance would have covered it, but now that it is an attack, we will be sued!**_

_Why don't we just attack them!_

_**Well Aisha, if you hadn't started the attack on that cargo ship a few light years back, we would have ammo LEFT to destroy the ship. **_

_**Gene?**_

Gene looked down at the girl, clinging to his chest.

_**Can you help me into my tank. I need to stabilize the ship now, and try to get some of our electricity back and running. **_

Nodding his head, Gene carefully helped the wobbly young woman to her tank, which was located at the middle back entrance of the command center. She had injured her ankle, which was more than likely sprained. She looked to be in excruciating pain, which caused Gene to feel angry all over. He was so angry he could have punched something, but he knew that Mel's tank would not only heal her, but improve her ankle as well. With his help she climbed into the tank and closed the latch, and not more than 2 seconds later appeared in a liquid tube in the command center good as new. Smiling to himself Gene sat down at his center in the middle of the room just in time to look at a screen suddenly pop up.

It consisted of a large smiley face, and then tuned into what had to be the cowboy bebop command center. An angry looking Jet with toasted hair, a wet Faye and a tired Spike all looking at the screen.

With a tone of voice used to discipline the most annoying of neighbors, Jet delivered the good news!

_**I hope you saved on your car insurance because you'll need more than that to help you here! See you on Judge Judy! **_

With that angry message, the screen disappeared and Gene slammed his hands on the control panel. Everyone turned with angry faces to Aisha and she shrank down with her oh so lovable catch phrase.

Mmrww?

** Hey you guys! Yeah I know, that sucks. I think imma re-post is and change this chapter I enough people say so. Well this is an introduction to the next chapter where both crews will be seen in the Judge Judy courtroom. It will be side-splitting laughter so hold on to your hats! I hope you enjoyed, fell free to review. No really… Review. Please for the love of Morning Glory review! Lol, See ya! ----**


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